(For Yuki!) Life Lessons

I promised a humorous post, and here it is! Most of these things i've actually done. Kenshin did #7, #8, #10(I swear, it was all Kenshin! I had nothing to do with this!), #12(me and my two cousins), and #13.


Life Lessons

#1: Pixy Stixs are not Kool Aid, they will not taste good if you mix them in water.

#2: Attempting to stab an immature person with a plastic butter knife is not nice; even if their your cousin and they deserve it.

#3: Spraying lemon juice on your neighbor's dog's nose just to see it walk around in circles is mean; but really, really fun.

#4: It doesn't matter how high on the furniture you climb; if you're allergic to cats, they will find you.

#5: Do not kiss the computer monitor, it does not taste good and it's a lousy kisser.

#6: I am not allowed to jump around in the house when everyone is sleeping at 2AM in the morning just because I hear my favorite song.

#7: Just because some guy in the military named Skippy has an inflatable sheep doesn't mean you can have one too.

#8: Do not crucify the rats, even if some guy in the military did it too.

#9: I am not allowed to play 'Death-From-Above' so long as I am larger than a dog.

#10: Making sexual innuendos about milk at the breakfast table is very inappropriate.

#11: It IS possible to choke on air. Try not to get an aneurysm thinking about how.

#12: Attempting to play Laser Tag in a pitch black house at 3AM in the morning using glow-sticks is not a good idea. Everyone will gain at least five new bruises and a lecture.

#13: Plus, someone will always cheat by using a flashlight.

#14: Walking in on your cousin when he's half-naked is not a pretty sight.

#15: Walking in on him when he's half-naked and trying to put on Robin Hood tights when it's not even near Halloween is funny (and somewhat disturbing...)

~~~

And now, a riddle I found! You can irritate your family with it!

You're in a room with four walls and no exits, above you is a ceiling, below you is a floor, and in the room is a mirror and a table. How do you get out of the room?